Category: friends

Is Your Mouth Saved?

The good person out of the good treasure of his heart produces good, and the evil person out of his evil treasure produces evil, for out of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaks. (Luke 6:45)

How many times in life have you said things then you pray, “if only I could take that back?”

It’s not really a mouth problem, it’s a heart problem. I have to ask God daily to search me, know my heart ….see if there is any offensive way in me. That’s scriptural y’all. If we are going to start speaking right we are going to need to examine our heart, what’s in there? Is it deep-seated roots of bitterness? I’ve had to do some up-rooting in that area. Maybe hidden sin, sin your not even aware of that is why we ask God to reveal things to us. I have battled with the unknown cause of things time and time again, then suddenly, God reveals something I had forgotten all about and in a moment of repentance everything changes. God wants to purify our hearts so when we speak, out of the mouth flows issues of life. Life and death are in the power of the tongue (Proverbs 18:21). Our words are either building up or destroying, either bringing encouragement or inflicting harm and shaping destinies. I have caused so much damage in my own life due to words I have spoken, all because of the issues of my heart. That’s where the scripture verse says, “they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof,” that’s the consequences of what you say, it will eventually return to you. You know our speech reflects our internal character to. I’ve been guilty of having the character of speaking death into my own life as well as other people by, gossiping, encouraging fear by speaking possibilities of something happening “what IF?,” I have even created conflicts in relationship due to words I have spoken. These are not things I am proud of, but seriously I write in transparency. As I always say, “I am a sinner in need of a Savior.” Thank you Jesus for saving me, and yes my mouth needs saving to. I do speak life as well. I try to encourage people just like in writing the breadandwater blog or Encouraging Each Other Facebook Group my friend and I have had for the past 5 plus years. I have gotten better about speaking truth, the Word over people’s lives, building in them a hope for their future or whatever they may be going through at the moment. My husband likes doing little construction projects occasionally and I have watched him use his tools to tear things down then turn around and build something beautiful with those same tools. Words are like tools; either to build people up or a weapon that breaks spirits. So the question here, is our mouth saved? Well I’d say is your heart healthy? Do you have the love of Jesus living in you? Do you even have Jesus in you, first and foremost? If the answer is yes to those questions, then I believe you can have a saved mouth. Like all things in life, it’s a choice. How we speak is a choice. We need to start doing more self-examining, I’m speaking to myself here, just saying. Start discerning the thoughts and intentions of your heart, why you say what you say. Something else I have learned over the past year, it that it is always better to respond versus react. Response can sometimes be silent. Reaction can lead to words that may cause regret. I have experienced enough regret to last a lifetime and again. Final word for today …

Shalom

A New Chapter

“Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing!” (Isaiah 43:18-19)

Transformation here we come!

Ruth: Her story of loss and widowhood was rewritten into one of redemption, honor and becoming part of the lineage of Jesus.

Job: His story of unfathomable suffering was transformed when God restored his life, giving him twice as much as he had before.

The Woman at the Well: Jesus broke her cycle of shame and failed relationships, rewriting her story into one of purpose as a witness.

Won’t He? Yes He will. God is not a respecter of persons, if he did it for them he will do it for me. God can’t do what our free will will not allow Him to, so here we go, have your way Lord. I Have struggled writing this today, I actually wrote it yesterday but when I woke up this morning the Holy Spirit had me do a little revising. I needed corrected about a thing or two. As I was writing I was steadily wanting to take over the message that He was giving me, taking the pen right out of His hand already. I heard Him loud and clear this morning saying, “If I’m going to be able to continue writing your story, you are going to need to surrender and be obedient as in the past when I was doing a new thing in you.” Correction is never easy, but oh so worth the value. Obviously being this is a new chapter in my life, I haven’t been here before so I have no way of knowing what this looks like, well not completely. God has been more than generous in giving me little peaks into what lies ahead, rather some areas that are going to require change. One of the areas is in stewarding my time. Who ,What, When and Why are some questions that I am going to have to ask myself before taking on the task. God revealed to me that many of the hurts I have been experiences in my life of late are due to taking on responsibilities of others that are not my cross to bear. When I look at ministry, it’s not just serving in a particular area of the church, it’s more than that. I see it in every area of my life. My family has always been my first ministry, unfortunately I have missed it on several occasions. I see a new range of focus in my future story. One that allows others to pick up their cross and follow Jesus, my only part is to lead them to Him. I said it before and I’ll say it again, I have missed it time and time again all because I couldn’t say no, or I didn’t want to see them going in the wrong direction so I took the cross for them, that is not nor ever was God’s best, it was simply me in a ditch effort to try to help, which I was the one who ended up in the ditch sadly to say. But hey, God’s mercies are new every morning and His grace is sufficient, to prepare a new way, a new path for me to walk in. Hallelujah! I have heard things said about me that are lies straight from hell. I’m not going to allow hate, resentment or unforgiveness to keep me from the place that the Lord is wanting to take me, instead I will say as Jesus said on the cross, “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they are doing” (Luke 23:34). I, like Jesus am feeling the immense pain from what others have said and done to me, but I too have to choose how I will respond. There are so many words in the Word of God that pertain to who I am, and I am claiming them for myself, that I may have life and have it more abundantly. God says, I am victorious, loved, redeemed (Proverbs 18:21) Romans 8:28: “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him …” This is a promise that God can and will use past negative experiences to create a positive, redemptive story in my life. I am ready to close this chapter and move on to the next. God is the author of my life, not my circumstances. The weakness that I have been feeling is going to be my new strength. In the book of Isaiah …a way in the wilderness; God says, where there is no clear path forward, He will create one. Rivers in the desert; where there is no natural relief or refreshment, God provides it. A little further down in Isaiah, God promises to pour His life-giving Spirit upon his weary people, all of this is for His glory. I am ready for God to receive all the glory in my new story. I’m done repeating cycles like the woman at the well. I’m looking for redemption like Ruth, to be honored for the good that I do. Not from people, but from my Heavenly Father, the One who knows me and knows my worth. Re-write, re-direct, whatever that may look like, I’m ready.

Letting Go …and Letting God write what I cannot.

Open Wounds

“The Lord is near the brokenhearted and saves the contrite in spirit.” (Ps.34:18)

Up close and personal today. There are some ares in my life that I am still not able to share about because the wounds have not healed and they are susceptible to infection. I believe there are many that can relate to this. Issues of the heart are no joking matter, they are real like the breath in my lungs. Some days it feels as if healing is impossible, when every little thing that touches it causes the wound to begin bleeding again. Yet I know I am not broken I am simply in a place of deep transition, transitioning into the person God wants me to be. I know that if I turn to Him with this unbearable pain He will be there to heal my wounds but sometimes it is still a hard thing to do. I cannot rush the process though because there is work being done, I have to trust the process. Believe it or not, crying and feeling the pain is not a sign of crumbling but rather releasing and letting the healing begin. Sometimes while the wound is in this state you have to stay away from the thing that caused the injury in the first place, creating space for emotional detachment. I write because this is an outlet for me to release and process my emotions. I find that listening to worship music is a great help, because the lyrics are those that bring truth and good thoughts to my mind. I begin focusing on the things that are lovely, pure and of good report versus the thing that has me broken at the time. Nature is my go to place, it has a way of putting me in a completely different mood, relieves the stress of it all. Sometimes I fall into isolation, never a good thing, being with others is crucial to healing. God will use the right people to speak the right things to you that you cannot hear at that very moment. Whatever we are going through that is keeping this wound from healing completely does not define who we are, our future or our worth. Instead we need to see this is a chance to grow stronger and wiser. Don’t worry about the situation, just focus on your own recovery. Let God do what you cannot do. Obviously I am talking to myself here as well as you. Again I am processing, what I need to do in order to receive my healing. The scripture in Psalms tells us that God is not distant, but active in comforting those in pain. He offers us comfort, He is present and He will heal those with shattered emotions or crushed spirits. Psalms 147:3 says, “He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds”. He is our refuge when overwhelmed, our strength when hope seems lost and He promises that heartbreak will not have the final word.

Okay, I feel better … how about you?

Peace Is A Priority

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God …will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” (Phil. 4:6-7)

Number one priority for actively pursuing peace involves being in harmony with others. Though that is not always possible, so I’ll share another scripture which says, (if possible, live peaceably with all) Romans 12:18. That takes a little pressure off of me because sometimes it takes time to heal from being hurt, to forgive or be forgiven before I am able to find that peace. Hate is a strong word, but I am going to use it in expressing my feelings on discord, “I hate it.” Having unresolved issues with someone is one of the worst feelings I could have. I’ve lived my whole life as a people pleaser until recently. I have learned my mental and emotional well being is very important to me and I have made a deliberate decision not to allow anyone to steal my joy purposely amongst other things. My focus for peace is about more than people though. I have hobbies, different ministries I am involved in, home projects, etc. obviously all these things take time. This requires prioritizing because if I don’t life becomes total chaos,and chaos is definitely not peace. I have become intentional or as Charlie Brown in the caption above said, “I make deliberate life choices.” The beginning of this year I received a word which I have written about before, “Intentional.” One of the things I have been intentional about this year is protecting my peace at all cost. I had to take a step back and look at some of the different ministries I was involved in and let a couple things go to free up my time to better the other ministry work as well as give me a break here and there. I’ve gotten rid of things in my home that were making for unnecessary workload, when I had more than I could do already. Did some scaling back on monitarial things that weren’t necessary. Took a sabbatical from social media. Stopped taking every call/text that came across my phone. Busyness can really rob you of your peace. On a spiritual note regarding peace, I have found that humility is huge. You know you can just be quiet, you don’t have to fight about things, that’s never the solution anyway. Being right in a disagreement is overrated anyway, conflict always results in loss of peace. I think that’s called being PRIDEFUL. So I would rather choose peace over trying to be right about my opinion. Like another Blog I wrote; Mind Your Own Biscuits and Life Will Be Gravy …that’s Peace right there now, just say’n. Keep to yourself and don’t allow other people to bring you into their drama. They say, experience is one of life’s greatest teachers, but the Word of God is the best teacher. Do it right the first time and you won’t have any regrets.

What regrets are you experiencing right now? Do you need to seek after or pursue peace? Do you need to unload some things from an overburdened lifestyle? What do you need to be deliberate about to receive peace in your life?

Wedding Crashers

Proverbs 17:22 says, “Laughter is like a good medicine.”

Everyday we need to take our medicine. Find something that makes you laugh. See the humor in life. Put a smile on. Be friendly. Be good natured. Learn to laugh! Laughter is powerful and free accessible medicine, all natural. I like all natural remedies. Some of the benefits are: It lowers stress hormones, increases immune cells, reduces disease risk and boost cardiovascular health. It relaxes muscles through the release of endorphins, which is a natural pain relief. It increases serotonin and dopamine, causing a better mood as well as giving us the ability to see things in a new perspective when approached with challenging situations. When we share laughter with others we are able to connect better and resolve conflicts.

I have a newfound love for laughter. When I am faced with a heaviness or a difficult situation, mostly a place where I just can’t see past it at the moment, finding something to laugh about brings a calming effect and then I can focus on whatever it is that I am needing to deal with. I just have to loosen the load so to speak. Every time you are able to find some humor in a situation, you win. I love to joke around not in a malicious kind of way, but one that brings others to laughter, I feel a sense of connection when that happens. Everybody needs someone to make them laugh when they think that they’ll never smile again. In Proverbs laughter is portrayed as a gift from God, a sign of joy, and a therapeutic force. When we laugh, we neither think, grieve, or feel. In Eccl. 3:4, it’s a natural part of life’s rhythm, “a time to weep and a time to laugh.” Laughter is the best medicine but if you laugh for no reason, you need medicine …LOL. My husband and I love to laugh, we laugh at some of the craziest things, but the best times are when we are laughing so hard we are crying and trying to stop but can’t and end up laughing even harder and longer. I also love it when I hear someone else laughing uncontrollably, it causes me to start laughing and I may not even know what it is about it just becomes contagious.

I challenge you today to think about something really funny, whether from your past, an experience that was really bazaar, just something …and begin to laugh. I promise you will feel so much release from the mundane, or just happier than you already are.

Learn to Laugh …Life is much better when you are ~

Thick Skin

You have heard that it was said, An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth. But I say to you, do not resist the one who is evil. But if anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn him the other also. And if anyone sue you and take your tunic, let him have your cloak as well. (Matt. 5:38-40)

Tough hide and a tender heart. True love is an essential component of thick skin. God guards our hearts and gives us the power to forgive those that have wronged us. I’ll just let you in on a little secret, it is going to take Jesus residing in your heart to be able to do this. This is a supernatural kind of love that comes from Him. It is our greatest defense against feeling overwhelmed when being criticised or having someone attack us personally. We need thick skin to not hold a grudge or try to retaliate. “Jesus said love your enemies and pray for those that persecute you.” (Matt. 5:44) You are developing thick skin and a soft heart all at the same time when you pray like that. Prayer doesn’t just change the situation, it changes us. I have prayed for people for long periods of time, years even, not feeling like it …sorry, but true. But then one day God replaced the grudge, animosity, with compassion. Regarding prayer; just keep doing it, the weaker our prayer life, the thinner our skin, and the harder our heart. The spirit is willing but the flesh is weak (Matt. 26:41). Prayer will change the attitude of you heart if you don’t give up. I also am not saying that this anger will not creep back in at times, that’s why we have to learn to master this thing called prayer, temptations to fall back in our old ways are always there. Learn to leave a closed door closed. Here is a little prayer you can pray for yourself to help you walk with a spirit of humility and compassion.

Lord Jesus ….Forgive my hardness of heart and my selfishness. I am weak, but you are strong. Strengthen and protect me from my natural ways of responding to situations. Teach me how to walk in the Spirit rather than in the flesh. Grant me your peace, wisdom, love and compassion. Wash away my sins with the blood you shed for me by the Holy Spirit, make me more like Jesus every day. Please give me thick skin and a soft heart, especially when my natural impulses flare up under pressure. In your holy name I pray. Amen.

Yep That’s Me

A friend loves at all times (Proverbs 17:17a)

The Bible describes a good friend as loyal, loving, sacrificial, and honest, even closer than a brother. True friendship will support one another through difficult times, sharpening each other’s character, reflecting the selfless love shown by Jesus and by being honest. Isn’t it great to have a friend or multiple friends that are so close that you can speak truth about yourself and not be judged? I like to think of myself as the friend in the Bible who is; iron sharpening iron (Proverbs 27:17). Trying to offer up some constructive advice, helping to carry their burdens through the difficult times. I’ve never been asked to lay my life down for one of my friends, but I have been asked to stop what I’m doing and help a friend in need. Put my tasks, appointments, agenda aside and come to the rescue. Sometimes a friend just needs a little encouragement from someone they can trust. I have a couple friends like that. I call them my ride or die friends. They have been the ones that have come to my rescue when no one else could or would have. They are the ones that picked me up off the ground and dusted me off when the winds of life threw dirt at me. They are the ones when I couldn’t think clearly because all hope and vision had left me. They prayed with me, shared the promises of God with me, reminded me that this very moment that I was in would one day pass and I would be okay. They are the ones that I can cry, cuss and discuss anything with and the whole while they are reminding me of who I am and who I belong to, allowing me to not be perfect, but human. I am a sinner saved by grace, I bleed just like everyone else, but my friends are the ones that put the band-aide on me, while Jesus heals my wounds and allows me to wear these scars proudly to show of His amazing grace and mercy, He truly is the best friend anyone could ever have. Jesus is such a good friend, that he blessed me with earthly friends to be that constant reminder in my life who He is. I told you, I’m that person that will always tell you exactly what I think.