Category: relational

Smoking

But you are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, His own special people, that you may proclaim the praises of Him who called you out of darkness and into His marvelous light; ( 1 Peter 2:9)

HE CHOSE US and WE MATTER!

Yesterday was the second annual fundraiser for my dear friends Non-Profit organization, which I have had the opportunity to help host both years. I also, am given the opportunity to sit in on these amazing guest speakers Break-Outs throughout the day. This conference is an emotional health conference for professionals. To help equip them to better serve their employees, co-workers, patients whatever field of work that might be. And more importantly learning how to better care for themselves so that they can be the best version of themselves doing what they do without the feeling of they are not enough, they do not matter or all to often …burnout. I tell you that to also say, I’m NOT a professional of any kind, but I MATTER. And because I matter and so do all the volunteers that come to help out in the conference we are ALL given the opportunity to sit in on any topic we feel might help us to be the best version of ourself. This picture of the chimney was from one of the Guest Speakers and I am sure she would not mind if I shared her name and or even a little bit about her. Lynette Thrower; her topic was on “The Matters of Mattering” which is also the name of her book she authored. “The Matters of Mattering: I, You, We Matter,” regarding belonging, validation, and emotional authenticity. Her teaching challenges us to reflect on how we assign our value, especially in relation to our performance, productivity, and personal worth. If you look her up on Instagram you can see how she defines herself; Lover of YHWH. Prayer warrior. Peaceful poet. She realizes her life matters and so does ours. The chimney was an illustration from a Highlight magazine back in the day. I didn’t get a picture of the first clip, but it was a large chimney telling the small chimney that he was to small to smoke. This was suppose to be a riddle in the magazine, but there was so much more to be taken from that photo than a riddle. Here was this happy little chimney doing what he knew he was suppose to do and then being told, your to little to smoke. The little chimney became afraid of his purpose so then refuses to smoke. And as you may already know, a chimney must smoke in order to keep the house from backing up with smoke, and from the air becoming toxic and people getting harmed. So there is purpose in a smoking chimney. If the chimney/we allow what others say to us we can find ourself withdrawing from our purpose, preoccupied with the criticism, and then our vision of ourself becomes distorted. We begin to feel insignificant, invisible or unimportant to others. We are then no longer doing what God created us for or our God-given gift or talent. When that kind of fear takes hold of us, we begin to distort how we see ourselves and our place in this world. We begin having false beliefs about the role we were designed to fulfill. I recently felt all of that in my blog writing. I called it writers remorse when telling my husband about it. As Lynette says, “Our lives are meant to be a beautiful symphony of purpose and belonging, but fear introduces a dissonance that can overwhelm our sense of mattering.” I’m not going to go into the complete teaching on this, but I wanted to share from the beginning because we do have purpose and we do matter and that “WE” is EVERYBODY. God says we are: Chosen (John 15:16), Loved (Jeremiah 31:3), Forgiven (1 John 1:9), Precious (Is. 43:4), Strong (Is. 40:31), Unique (Ps. 39:13), Important (1 Peter 2:9), Protected (Ps. 121:3), Enough (2 Cor. 12:9). So we are able to say, I am____________, you fill in the blank. Be that little chimney and SMOKE with your calling, gift or talent.

Love of Strangers

“…distributing to the needs of the saints, given to hospitality.” (Ro. 12:13)

This verse is a perfect example of the photo above. It symbolizes the word Hospitality, meaning, “love of strangers.” Of course, the primary reference is to housing travelers, though all forms of hospitality are included. We in street ministry dedicate ourselves to meeting the needs of others, in witnessing to them about the love of Christ. It may be bringing them food, offering prayer, trying to find housing for them, clothing or other material needs they may have. It may even be taking them to Dr. appointments or getting them necessary medications. But most of all its loving on them, letting them feel Jesus through our touch. This is not only the things I mentioned above but also, it is an act of stewardship. Hospitality should also be offered willingly and joyfully, not as a burden. It is a way to minister God’s grace to others. We all have gifts and here is a scripture for us to know what to do with that gift; “Offer hospitality to one another without grumbling. Each of us should use whatever gift we have to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms.” (1 Pe. 4:9-10). God has even built meaningful relationships with some of these strangers and me. It truly amazes me how far a little hospitality will go. I have learned how to feel deeply within for some of the strangers I have encountered. Not only that, but gratitude for the opportunity to be the hands and feet of Jesus, to know what He felt towards others. To truly love someone because He loves them, that is such an amazing kind of love. Words to live by; whenever God’s people are in need, be ready to help them. Always be eager to practice hospitality. To welcome the stranger is to extend the hand of God.

Focus

And you will seek Me and find Me, when you search for Me with all your heart. (Jeremiah 29:13)

I have often spent hours and at times days looking for God. “Where are You, Lord?” “I can’t see you anywhere” “Have you left me? Do you not care what I’m going through?” That is some of the questions I would find myself saying, all the while knowing He is there, He hears me, He loves me, He cares what I am going through. But I really wasn’t focused on finding Him, I was in panic mode. At times I would be looking at my problems like that needle in the haystack, they were so BIG that was all I could see. Instead of looking at God, who is even BIGGER than that. That scripture in Jeremiah speaks that to me; when I search for Him with all my heart, I’ll find Him. Not when I’m so focused on my problem or situation I’m going through, NO, when I am whole-heartedly seeking after Him, FOCUSED on finding Him! God is always waiting on us to cry out to Him, but with our whole heart, trusting Him, not just hoping He will hear us or show up. I can’t tell you how many times over my life span, I’ve worried about finances. Before I was a believer well of course I was my own god, so I’d just try to figure it all out and if it worked great; if not I’d try something else, but when I became a believer in Christ, that made the real change. Not saying I didn’t get off kilter at times, but I now knew who was my source and who to go searching for over my finances. Can I just say, EVERY time I have searched with my whole heart, God has shown up. I’m not saying every time my finances where in dire straight did He bail me out immediately, but He did give me direction as to what to do and what not to do anymore, if I didn’t want to go through that again. Ya know, He’s a Daddy, just tak’n care of His girl, daddy’s have to do a little correcting at times. So, God is not a needle in the haystack, if He were He’d be like the one in the picture above. God is accessible, he desires to be found, and a rewarder of those who diligently seek His presence, strength and righteousness. Here are just a few other scriptures you can refer too; (Deut. 4:29): “But if from there you seek the Lord your God, you will find him if you seek him with all your heart and with all your soul. (Hebrews 11:6): …he who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him”. and one more I’ll share, (Matt. 7:7-8): :Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will opened to you.” So remember, it is your “whole heart” He is after and if you will search for Him with that, you will find Him.

Am I, My Enemy?

No weapon formed against you shall prosper (Isaiah 54:17)

If you are allowing your tongue to speak words against yourself, you are becoming your own opposition. You are allowing possible attacks to arise that could destroy you or at the bare minimum keep you from prospering in what you are desiring. God is telling us in the written Word in Isaiah that He condemns the accusers, even as He has equipped His servant/us/all saints, Jews and gentiles, to do so. If God has given us the power in our tongue to come against opposition, challenges, or attacks, ultimately, we are destroying ourselves if we are speaking anything different from His Word. Further in that verse it’s telling us “…and every tongue which rises against you in judgement You shall condemn,” that’s indicating false accusations. You are speaking false things over yourself, STOP IT! Take those words out of your mouth right now and start speaking truth over your situation. Don’t let the father of lies deceive you into believing a lie over what the Lord is trying to do in your life or whatever it is your believing for. Just like writing this Blog. The minute my husband brought this up to me, that I should write again and do it in a Blog, I immediately said, “Oh, I can’t do that, I don’t have the background and training for that.” That’s when I had to stop myself and remember who was actually calling me to this and if He was calling me to it, He would also equip me for it (Is. 58:11) Where He guides, He provides! It is so easy to catch yourself believing for something or petitioning the Lord for something and at the same time speaking words of defeat. Wisdom flows from a thoughtful heart. Think about what you are saying before you say it. Use constructive words. Your words can be a tree of life or destructive. They can heal you or they can harm you. Choose what you speak! Remember, not every thought needs to be expressed; once said, words cannot be taken back.

A Worshiping Warrior

Are you going through some tough stuff right now, feeling all the pressures of life? Let me let you in on a little secret. If you become a worshiping warrior, you will find yourself thriving under those pressures, it’s called a “holy boldness” praising God even during the trials. Honestly, I never saw myself waring in worship. I thought that worship was just a time of singing praises to the Lord not realizing that I was actually doing warfare right then. Recently I have found myself in a number of situations that I felt the fight or flight coming on. I also have found a better way to fight those battles. Worship is the way; it takes the load off me and right on Him. That whole flight thing is NEVER a win, unless it is removing yourself from the situation temporarily to allow the Holy Spirit to speak to you regarding your circumstance. Also, I should let you know, EVERYTHING happens in God’s time, so be a patient worshipper. First, you are going to need to have a surrendered heart. A true warrior for God is first a worshiper acting out of obedience, humility and submission, something God has been working on in me for the past couple years in a really BIG way. Worship, praise and obedience are our main weapons to achieve victory. Which means we are going to need to stand firm in faith, endure some hardships and trust God to fight the battles on our behalf. After all, God is the ultimate warrior. He’s the One fighting our battles, we simply are worshipping Him in the process. (Exodus 15:3) says, The LORD is a man of war; The LORD is His name. (The battle has been won, and the praise belongs to the Victor.) In verse 6 of chapter 15 of Exodus, we can see God’s active and powerful presence among His people. God is active and He is all powerful and He will fight each of our battles, nothing is too big for our God. That is a God to be WORSHIPPED! If you will practice worshipping God, you can actually get so engrossed in worship you will not even remember what it was that had you upset to begin with. The Holy Spirit is just good like that. (Speaking from experience). Of course, no one gets up and leaves the house before getting fully dressed, well you might, so let me say it this way. When a warrior gets up for battle, he/she puts on their full armor. In the spiritual realm that is called “the whole armor of God.”

I keep this wardrobe list on my refrigerator, so when I get up in the morning and grab that first cup of coffee, I am reminded what I will be wearing for the day. Another side note: remember we are fighting spiritual battles not physical, totally different attire. We are not worshipping ourselves because we are strong and mighty fighters, we are worshipping God the Creator of the universe who fights spiritual beings we cannot see. I want to talk a little more about praise. In the Old Testament the tribe of Judah, meaning “praise,” was instructed to go first into battle, demonstrating that worship precedes victory. And in (Acts 16:25) Paul & Silas exemplified praise being used to break chains and overcome obstacles. If God is fighting our battles and He is victorious in all things, why wouldn’t we worship Him? Why would we want to wear ourselves out physically, mentally, emotionally even spiritually trying to do it any other way? When & where to worship? For me, it’s in the morning before my day even starts. I praise Him for waking me up, breath in my lungs, opportunities that He is placing in my path for the day, etc. etc. Later in the day it may be a phone call from a friend facing something and I simply stop for a moment and thank God in remembrance of one of His many promises to meet that need. At the end of the day, it may be a moment of silence just reflecting on His goodness, even when I didn’t see anything, I know He is on it. Before bed if there is anything else still lingering in my mind, it’s letting go and thanking Him for the rest I am about to receive once my eyes close because every battle is His, He fights for me.

Preparation for Paradise

“In My Father’s house are many mansions; if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and receive you to Myself; that where I am, there you may be also. And where I go you know, and the way you know.” (John 14:2-4)

Today is my dad’s birthday as you can see on his stone. It’s been a long time since we have celebrated birthdays or anything else for that matter, but I know one day we will be celebrating all things together. First, I have to tell you he is my stepdad. I was 4 years old when he married my mom, so he is actually the man who raised me. I was engrafted into his family, much like we are with our Father God, through Jesus Christ. The year before he left his earthly home he was diagnosed with cancer and somewhere around a year before that him and our mother divorced after nearly 30 years of marriage. We lived in Texas at the time; I was married to someone else, and I had two children from a previous marriage. My dad was doing his treatments at MD Anderson in Houston about an hour from where I lived. He stayed with me part of that year as well as my sister just under me, his biological daughter. She was divorced and living alone, until my stepbrother came down from out of state to spend some time with our dad as he was ill. Dad had two sons from his first marriage, me, and then him and my mom had two daughters. The one I just spoke of is a little more than 5 years younger than me and the other sister is 17 years younger than me. The two stepbrothers both lived out of state and there wasn’t a lot of communication between them and us. Unfortunately for all the siblings, I being the oldest of all the kids was the only one who had children, therefore their children never had the chance to know him. Dad and I would stay up all hours of the night talking, due to the medicines he was taking, he couldn’t sleep. We didn’t have the best relationship to say the least as I was growing up, but when I was considered adult age and out of the house, my mom became pregnant with my youngest sister, and we began to form a bond then. We became pretty close over the next few years; he even coached me through my pregnancies. Back to our long nights. It first started out him seeking forgiveness from me for the horrible things I went through as a child, his part in that, that is. Which by doing so, enabled me to forgive him. Then he began talking to me about God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit. You see, his father was my grandfather that was a minister, a minister my dad’s entire life, well my grandfather’s entire life as well, after the war. My dad knew the Word of God; he just didn’t live like it most of the time. So, to say he reared us up in the likeness of Jesus is a far cry from that. But he was making up for lost time now. I believe he knew after about 6 months into his treatments, he wasn’t going to be here long, and he had some work to do, that work I call, “Preparation for Paradise.” He knew what the Word said about having unforgiveness against your brother & others, and the importance of it. That if he wanted his Father in heaven to forgive him, he must forgive his brother and seek forgiveness where it was needed as well. He was on a mission, and he was leading by example now. He went the distance sick and all to find those he needed to make right with. Back to our long nights again. He told me about a book he had received from his parents about the Holy Spirit, and he wanted me to read it, like as many times as it took before I really understood it. This was very important to him, that I get understanding. I still have that book today and two years after he left us, I spent an entire day reading it aloud to my baby sister and I remember my current husband like it was yesterday, coming home from work finding the two of us bawling. When he asked what was wrong, I told him, “I have sinned, the unpardonable sin. I had blasphemed the Holy Spirit.” He reassured me I hadn’t, if I had I certainly would not be that upset. Gotta love baby Christians! Later I finally got it, and I did read that book a couple more times just like my dad suggested. You see my dad didn’t have anything of earthly value to leave us kids, but what he did have was knowledge and understanding of our Father God and His plan and purpose for our lives. The legacy he was about to leave me was one I would have to grow into, but he prepared me with a good foundation to grow on. I learned a lot in that last year of his life and I know now, what to leave my children as a legacy before I enter into Paradise. Two years after he entered into Paradise, I rededicated my life to the Lord and I have been diligently seeking him ever since. Thank you, Dad and Happy Birthday, see you soon.

Happy Valentine’s Day

“For God so loved the world, that He gave His only Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have eternal life. (John 3:16)

We humans really cannot comprehend the extent of God’s sacrifice, this type of love that He has for ALL humanity. God’s love is not restricted to any one type of person either, He wants EVERYONE to have eternal life with Him, that’s LOVE!

Valentine’s Day for many goes unnoticed, uncelebrated, undeserved or forgotten altogether. For some it may be missed because their love is no longer with them or maybe their marriage/relationship is on rocky grounds these days. Whatever the case, know that you are loved and being celebrated by the One who died for you. He has not forgotten you. If your love is no longer here on this side of paradise, He is here to comfort you. If you have been made to feel unworthy of being celebrated or undeserving, He says you are valuable, deeply loved, and redeemed, regardless of your past, mistakes, or feelings. God’s love is unconditional, everlasting, and not based on performance or deservingness. He cherishes you. You are fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalms 139:14). I have loved you with an everlasting love (Jer. 31:3) He loved us while we were still sinners (Romans 5:8) Except His grace today and see yourself as He sees you. Know that you truly are His Valentine.

Grateful

I will praise the name of God with a song, And I will magnify Him with thanksgiving (Psalms 69:30)

Sunday morning the last song we sang was, “God I’m Just Grateful” by, Elevation Worship. Doing a little reflecting right now about some of the things that were going through my mind as I sang those words.

There was no way until You made one Grace upon grace, hallelujah Even though I don’t deserve it, You did it Even though I couldn’t earn it, You give it Who am I that You keep me on Your mind? God, I’m just grateful for You God, I’m just grateful for You All my life, You’ve been right here by my side God, I’m just grateful for You God, I’m just grateful for You Holy, holy, there’s only one I give You glory for all that You’ve done Even though I don’t deserve it, You did it Even though I couldn’t earn it, You give it Who am I that You keep me on Your mind? God, I’m just grateful for You God, I’m just grateful for You (who am I?) All my life, You’ve been right here by my side God, I’m just grateful for You God, I’m just grateful for You Whoa, You kept me all my life Been here with me all this time And I, I’m lifting both my hands You gave me chance after chance, after chance And I, I’m giving all that I am ‘Cause You gave me chance after chance, after chance Who am I that You keep me on Your mind? God, I’m just grateful for You God, I’m just grateful for You All my life, You’ve been right there by my side God, I’m just grateful for You God, I’m just grateful for You (who am I) Who am I that You keep me on Your mind? God, I’m just grateful for You God, I’m just grateful for You All my life, You’ve been right there by my side God, I’m just grateful for You God, I’m just grateful for You (I survived) I survived and I am here to testify God, I’m just grateful for You God, I’m just grateful for You I’m alright if they say I’m outta my mind God, I’m just grateful for You God, I’m just grateful for you

Of course, there was a couple lines repeated that I’d purposely did not add for time’s sake, but I think you got it. When I was in that moment of worship, my life began flashing before me. I remembered times when I was a very young child and certain people had violated me and hurt me very badly, times when I was a teenager doing worldly things and feeling like my life really had no meaning and no one loved me, battling feelings of why I should even be alive. I remembered broken relationships; car accidents do to drug & alcohol addictions. Unforgiveness and bitterness that I had held onto many times for way too long. The longer we sang that song to the Lord, I began to dance and at one point I believe I was actually shouting out the words of how “grateful” I was. The thought that I am ALWAYS on His mind made me feel important, loved and valued. I was in awe of the many, many chances He had given me to change my ways, turn my life in the other direction, get on the right path, the one that leads me to Him. How God had taken this mess and is allowing me to turn it into a message. A message of His goodness, His grace, His unconditional love for us. How He is always right there by my/our side. And even though I/we never deserved it, He gives it. I never in a million years could have earned what He has given me. Grace, upon grace. After church was over, I was mingling in the lobby, there was an extremely excited feeling inside of me, one that made me just want to love on everyone I came into contact with. Actually, I think I was one of the last to leave before the next service was about to begin. I was thinking to myself, maybe I should just stay, so I could enter back into that song of gratitude one more time.

The Source of My Peace

Peace, I leave with you; My [perfect] peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Do not let your heart be troubled, nor let it be afraid. [Let My perfect peace calm you in every circumstance and give you courage and strength for every challenge.] (John 14:27) (AMP)

Jesus! That is who my source is. “Trust” I put my trust in Him and Him alone. (Philippians 4:7) means more to me today than days past. “And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus” I have struggled with the need to “KNOW.” Know what, where, when, why, how. Thanks be to Jesus; I have finally reached that place in my life where those questions aren’t as important to me as much as knowing who holds the answer to ALL of them. I used to become angry, frustrated, l would be discouraged to the point of making myself sick literally with the need to “KNOW.” That is actually one of the causes of why I suffered from depression so many times in my life. You cannot have peace, if you are trying to figure everything out in your own mind. It takes trusting the One that is and will cause everything to come into agreement with what the Lord our God wills for us, our life. “You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust in you” (Isaiah 26:3). Have you ever struggled with sleep? Your mind just won’t shut off? You continue to allow things to play over and over and over. I have, way too many nights. Now, if something is bothering me before I go to sleep, I simply let it go, let God have it, there is absolutely nothing I am going to be able to do about it, so by letting Him have it, I can rest. If it is something I actually need to deal with, He will bring it back up to me in the morning, with new insight about it, because I put my trust in Him and I am relying on Him for the answer, not me. “In peace I will lie down and sleep, for you alone, Lord, make me dwell in safety”(Psalms 4:8). When God gives you peace, it’s a divine gift of inner calm and confidence even when our life seems to be in turmoil. We are having faith that He is in control. He will guard our heart and mind from fear, allowing us to rest. If you want to receive this kind of peace, you need to develop confidence in God’s promises and character. Pray, talk to God about EVERYTHING, express your gratitude as you’re asking for what you’re needing from Him. Keep your mind on what is true, lovely, and pure, and keep your thoughts on God. I lately have been convicted of where my mind has been going. I once read a book of Joyce Meyer, Where the mind goes, the man follows” True! We have to be careful what we allow our mind to think on. Spend time in God’s Word, learning the scriptures that speak on peace, so whenever you are confronted with thoughts and feelings that bring you worry and discontentment, you can replace them with thoughts that bring peace to your mind instead. I pray for peace right now over everyone reading this, in Jesus’ name, Amen

Shalom my friends

It Was the Night Before

“If only I may touch His garment, I shall be made well.” (Matt. 9:21)

My story of the over-flowing of the Holy Spirit actually started the night before. Much like the woman in the Bible who we do not know her name, what we do know is she had a twelve-year affliction. She was in a dire situation; this affliction caused her physical pain as well as emotional isolation. She spent all the money she had with Dr’s, yet instead of getting better she grew worse. (Mark 5:26). Much like this woman I found myself afflicted in deep depression. I had just gone through the death of a child/adult, non the less a child to us. He had suffered two years with AML and when reaching his final days here on earth he wanted to do hospice at home with us. Which he had been living with us a good portion of the two years already, naturally we wanted the same. Before we knew he was not going to be able to get the bone marrow transplant, which we were believing and standing in faith for complete healing and he did finally receive his complete, total healing from the top of his head to the soles of his feet, just not here on earth. That is a whole other story, maybe one day I will share that because God did some preparation in him, us, his siblings and others for his eternal homecoming. Glory be to God for that. At the same time this was going on, a few months before he got really sick, I decided to breed my Doodle for the very first time and she had 15 puppies. I had to deliver the first 3 all by myself, this turned into a very LONG night, but it gets even worse. My husband was driving a coach bus for a company that required him to be out of town a LOT, this was one of those times. Our son was very sick just before the birth of the puppies and he needed to go to the hospital for a blood transfusion and that required him to stay in the hospital for a few days. When he came back home, he tried to help me out with the puppies, but he didn’t have the strength and I was not eating, or sleeping, I had lost 15 pounds in two weeks. Six weeks after much hard and I mean hard work, keeping 15 puppies alive and healthy, by myself, it was time to take the puppies to the veterinarian for their first series of shots, where they contracted parvo. I immediately went back to my vet, got the necessary meds, hydration bags, needles, etc. to come back home and build a quarantine area for sick, still nursing puppies. Thank God my husband was home for that week, or I think I might just be up there in Paradise with our son. We lost the first sick puppy, then we lost 2 more here at home, but praise God, He gave us the strength and everything else we needed to save these little guys & gals. Now my husband is back on the road again, and our son takes a turn for the worse. He immediately meets me at the hospital and that’s when we find out it’s time for him to come home on hospice. Everything happened so fast, I was literally living and moving on adrenaline only. The pain had gotten to be too much the last 24 hours for him, so we went to the hospital for those last hours. Then we had a funeral service to prepare for. Again, I am leaving so much out because I am trying to stay focused on the message I am trying to deliver here today. Honestly, I could write a series of books if given the time for most of these blogs. Now, back to the night before I received the mighty encounter with the Holy Spirit. Like the woman in the Bible, she spent so many years full of dead ends, helpless and hopeless, but she heard the reports about Jesus and that was all it took for this disheartened woman to move forward, there was this tiny seed of hope in her heart, that gave her the courage to take a BIG risk. That’s when she reached out to touch His cloak, with faith believing for her healing. She had to be bold as well, because she was out in the crowd with all the people and Jesus, she wasn’t even supposed to leave her home. When she made her way to Jesus, as soon as she touched the edge of His garment the bleeding, her affliction had stopped (Luke 8:44). Mark says, “Immediately her bleeding stopped and she felt in her body that she was freed from her suffering” (Mark 5:29) But her story is not over. Later, when Jesus wants to know who touched Him, Jesus didn’t humiliate her in front of the crowd, instead you hear Him calling her “Daughter” and tells her, “Your faith has made you well.” All because she dared to reach out to Him for help when every earthly avenue had ended in nothing but loss and despair. Back again to the night before. I was all alone again, after burying puppies, saying my goodbyes to our son, and watching my husband leave again for another lengthy road trip. It was around six in the evening, and I decided to take what little energy I had and get in the shower. I cried out to Jesus with everything I had inside of me. I needed a miracle, I needed change in my life, I needed strength, I needed someone to love and care for me, right now, this very moment or take me out of here, yes that is exactly what I said to Him. I think I was crying harder than the water was coming out of the shower head and of course my voice was as load as a train coming down the track. I needed Jesus to hear me! Then, suddenly, I heard Him. He was comforting me, telling me He had me and everything was going to be alright. He instructed me to go to this Woman’s conference the next morning. I really did not want to go there; I didn’t feel I fit in with the women there and I was already feeling all sorts of negatives inside me. Fear had been playing a huge role in my life at that time as well. Satan loves to use fear as one of his tactics to keep us from our destination. Well, let me tell you, that next morning I got up early, mustered up all the courage I could and I went! I didn’t just go, I sat on the first row, end seat, and when the worship music began, I jumped up and went to that alter with all the bravery and boldness I had in me. That’s where I released EVERYTHING and I mean EVERYTHNG. Fear was gone! By the time the conference was over, I felt equal to any woman there. I had been delivered, set free from my afflictions! and I could hear Him call me Daughter. Then, comes morning. Feel free to read the blog, titled, “Where You lead, I Will Follow” if you haven’t already.